Saturday, February 23, 2019

Delighting your feminine soul

Being a feminine woman is one of my favourite topics to think about.  I was born in October under the sign of Libra, and adore all things luxuriously pink, soft, gentle, and feminine which befits a star-sign ruled by Venus, the goddess of love.

In both of my ‘Thirty Chic Days’ books there is a chapter on femininity.  These chapters detail my favourite easy, simple and mostly free ways of bringing more femininity into my everyday life.

One thing that always boosts my feminine soul is to potter (or as some of you say, ‘putter’). I am never happier than when pottering at home – organizing, tidying and prettifying our abode.

I have realized just how happy these tasks make me when I thought a few days ago ‘I feel really happy, I wonder why?’  I mean usually I am happy, but I just felt extra sparkly and light-hearted, and it was because I’d given myself the time and space to organize paperwork, do some decluttering and add the pretty homemaker touches around our home such as sewing new cushion covers, re-arranging décor items and generally making things look nice.

Conversely, when I consider myself ‘too busy’ for the cherry-on-the-top finishing touches, I don’t feel as good.  It’s as if those pretty touches give me the uplift and make a grey-skied day feel like the sky is a brilliant blue.  Inside my mind it’s a blue sky and it’s only when I look out the window that I see, in fact, the clouds.

Why not make the sun shine on yourself with your own thoughts and actions?  Thoughts in that you think about what makes you feel good, and actions when you actually do those things.

Reading a fun chick lit novel makes me feel happy and I try to always have one on the go. I switch between books on my Kindle and might read a bit of personal development in the evening, some chick lit before bed, and motivational literature with breakfast.  I usually have at least three that I am actively reading at the same time, but the mix always includes a feel-good romantic comedy simply because it makes me happy, and happiness is the key for me.

Sometimes I’ll go for the big names such as Marian Keyes, Sophie Kinsella or Jane Green, and others I’ll browse through Amazon’s Kindle section and find a new-to-me author where the cover and premise appeals. I love Jane Fallon too - hers are revenge chick lit! I've read all of her books and am just about to order the latest one.

A more grownup version of chick-lit that I enjoyed wholeheartedly recently was a novel by Penny Vincenzi called The Dilemma.  Penny’s books are hugely long, but on a Kindle they aren’t heavy to hold, thank goodness. And despite the length, I never thought, ‘When is this going to end!’ I used to think Penny wrote bonkbusters but they are more sophisticated than that – and there is only a tiny amount of sex :) – the appeal is that it is set in a wealthy London family. I have also read A Perfect Heritage and that was wonderful as well – set in, again, a wealthy London family who owned a prestige cosmetics brand.  I kept thinking of Estee Lauder’s company as I read it.

Sadly Penny died last year, but I am glad there are still plenty of her books for me to read.  And, at 78 when she died, she was part-way through writing her 18th book.  So inspiring!

Pottering and reading are just two of my feminine amplifiers, and I have many more such as home spa time, preparing food, dressing up to go out, and surrounding myself with feminine colours and images.

For me, doing all these things magnifies my strengths, which would go against common sense.  You would think you’d need to be stronger, push and speak out loudly (all very masculine ways of being), but I have found the opposite to be true.

When we enjoy and fully embrace the fact that we are female, that’s when we are in our greatest power.  Of course, you may feel completely differently and that’s as it should be.  Perhaps it is how you are underneath that makes the difference.  I am naturally quite a masculine personality type, so it feels good for me to temper that with a lot of softness, pink and luxury. The good news is that you can cultivate a soothing feminine hug to the soul in your life exactly as it is by identifying what makes you feel like your happiest self and then deciding to do more of those things.

What are your favourite ways to feel softer and more ladylike? Please share in the comments so we can build a library to all contribute to and borrow from. I think that’s a grand idea!


PS. If you haven't already seen my interview with the gorgeous Jennifer L. Scott of Madame Chic fame, take a look! I had such a great time chatting with Jennifer and I think it shows :)


  1. Scented body and hand lotions. Pretty toenail polish. Beautiful undergarments (no more granny panties, smile). Sensually scented candles. Beautiful bed coverings so when you walk into the bedroom, you are hit with beauty and again, sensuality! Always putting a bit of makeup on every morning along with a dab of perfume. And my top favorite way to feel feminine? Seducing my husband because he loves rendezvous so I can dress up - and he appreciates it!

  2. Hi Fiona, First, You look beautiful in the photo and I love your dress and pearls!

    I consider myself a feminist so sometimes I rebel against traditional roles like cleaning the house. I really dislike how I am singled out and instantly judged by others if the house isn't spotless, just because I am the woman and it's expected of me. I'm a libra too and I do enjoy femininity, just not certain stereotypes I guess. I love a clean and tidy home and since I'm frugal I do it all myself instead of hiring out, but boy I would rather be doing almost anything else than housework!

    Like you, I love my hen-lit (I'm older than you so I can't call it chick-lit, haha) and listening to music. Museums, art, velvet pillows, candlelight, rain, shadows from our garden trees, perfume, and so much more make me appreciate my feminine soul. I'm definitely a romantic, a romantic feminist I guess. I like my duality :)


  3. You do look cute in your photo and I agree with the other 2 comments! Great suggestions for feeling girly. I guess I could add allowing myself to have obsessions - fashion, jewelry & accessories... planning imaginary trips to faraway places is always fun. I love time with girlfriends - and flirting. Of course with my husband, but harmless make-others-feel-good flirting with anyone always perks up my day! Oh, and hugs and kisses whenever possible!

  4. You've gotten over your aversion to pearl necklaces. That's wonderful in my opinion. I love pearls and think they are beautiful and classy. Looking very Coco Chic friend!

  5. Well, that explains my love of pink and girly things in a streamlined way...I'm a Libra too!

  6. Hi Fiona,

    Hope you are well. I emailed you twice recently per your last book at to inquire about purchasing your author ecourse and if you were still doing that and if so if you cover formatting and DIY book covers as that is something I want to learn to do myself now for my eBooks, but I never heard back so wondered if you got my emails or just are no longer offering the course? Thank you and have a great day. Kathryn

  7. This hit me at just the right time! I have been feeling like I'm in a slump, the blahs. This morning I am willing myself out of it, and embraced my feminine side. My "cherry on top" - I used a vintage perfume that I love, and inhaled the amazing scent of Shalimar as I finished dressing. Thank you for your inspiration!!

  8. I was so thrilled to see you chatting with Jennifer! You are two of my favourite bloggers,,


Merci for your comment. Wishing you a chic day!

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