On living a low-key life

I read a book called My Friend Michael by Frank Cascio a while back, about Michael Jackson.  His life sounded so glamorous as it was filled with first class travel, the money to buy whatever he wanted, fabulous hotels where he booked out an entire floor, not to mention being an international celebrity.

But sadly we all know how Michael’s story ended.  As he grew bigger and bigger he began taking prescription medicines just to cope with the stress of it all.  Part of me wonders why he didn’t downsize his life and just enjoy what he had, but as it was all he had known from age 5, that thought probably didn’t occur to him.

Besides, you don’t get to be an international pop superstar by being a relaxed person who takes things in their stride.

As a side note, it was a fabulous book and I was really impressed by Michael’s goal-setting and visualisation that the author described so well.  The book is a good motivational tool.  I made heaps of notes!

I have a cousin who, having just turned 30 is an extremely successful businessman that lives literally all over the world.  He has two homes (Miami and London) and probably spends more time in hotel rooms and airplanes than he does in those.

He commented to a family member a while back that he feels sorry for me to be ‘stuck’ in our shop every day and never going anywhere.  I was quite astounded when I heard that as I have never felt this way and don’t consider our shop to be any different from other jobs I have had where I was obliged to show up at the office each day.  It’s just what I do.

An international life sounds glamorous and fun in theory, and I am definitely guilty of daydreaming when I see the celebrity photos of all the stars striding out from the airport gates (I have to process what they are wearing – cool sunglasses, check, leggings or skinny jeans, check, great jacket and loopy scarf, check).

But I am a home-loving person at heart who relishes routine and early nights, nesting and home-cooked meals.  If I even have too many late nights I am all out of sorts.

And to do all these things that I love you have to have a job or lifestyle that means you can live in the one city and be home at a reasonable hour.  I love that I spend each day in a familiar place and come to the same home each night.

When I go away on a rare holiday I just cannot wait to get home.  Heck, even when I am out for the day I cannot wait to get home!

So I guess it’s lucky I am not an international jetsetter then isn’t it?  But in the meantime I will enjoy perfecting the superstar travel uniform, just in case.

Image from zimbio.com

How To Look Expensive

I love thinking about the concept of dressing yourself in a way that conveys wealth and class in an old-fashioned sense.  Of course even money is no guarantee you will look good.  As we all know, extremely rich people can still look cheap.  There are plenty of walking testimonies, celebrity or otherwise, that you can look tacky even having spent plenty.  And there are those without much money but an innate sense of their own style who can look fabulously upmarket.

So what are the elements that make someone look quietly expensive?  Just for fun, here are my favourite ideas, gathered from internet searches over time, and also my own notes on when I feel good.  I have a few posts planned on this topic, with this first one focusing on our personal style.

Firstly, I think colour plays a big part.  To me, ‘expensive’ colours are neutrals, worn together.  Think a whole outfit in tones of caramel and cream.  Black and off-white or black and caramel are very stylish too.  In general black, navy, winter white, beige or caramel and red, and adding soft, muted tones of blush pink, sea-foam green, Tiffany blue and other such shades depending on what suits your colouring.  Colours I do not think are luxurious and wealthy are the lurid brights – neon pink, bright purple, yellow, orange.  Especially when paired with black.  I remember Trinny and Susannah saying once that putting black with a bright colour makes both look cheap.

Fabric-wise, I always think woven, or structured knits look more expensive.  Going the other way are floppy t-shirt knits or floaty boho type clothing.  Again, this is my personal taste in clothing coming out, but I always feel more pulled together in a pressed shirt and dark fitted jeans or a semi-fitted dress with simple lines.

Wearing classic styles, I consider to whisper money.  Luckily I love the classics and never feel more at home in a pair of well-cut jeans and a white shirt (to me, the Hamptons look), or in tailored black pants and a tuxedo front shirt or flattering black top with high heels if dressing up.

Shoe-wise, I love the classics too – the black leather ballet flat, white or navy canvas Converse sneakers (low-tops please, I’ll leave the hi-tops to the youngsters).  A perfectly pointed stiletto heel never goes out of fashion.  I always think chunky heels make a leg look chunky, even on skinny starlets.  Wedges ditto but there are some very cute wedges out there that are a bit finer, not so extreme that look pretty and well-bred.

I know tattoos are a big trend currently but I just think they look so vulgar.  In my opinion, there is no way anyone with class and style would have a tattoo, even a hidden one.  My husband often says a good business idea to get into would be tattoo removal, because there will be a lot of people wanting that in the future, and I have to agree.

Consider where you are going.  When I visit a dear friend in an old money part of town, I love dressing up in my most classic outfits, clothing I imagine I might wear if I lived there.  Without fail I always feel richest in my classic clothing.

Take notes on what others are wearing when you visit wealthy areas.  There is nothing I love more than (after dressing up) than taking a stroll around the shops, maybe try on some clothing or just have a look through the stores in fancy areas.  I notice the outfits and details others are wearing on the streets.  Funnily enough I am more interested in what the older ladies are wearing, I don’t know what’s up with that.  There is a different vibe in wealthy areas.  I like to absorb it and take it home with me.

Wearing big sunglasses I think imparts an air of mystery and glamour.  I have gotten out of the habit over winter but need to polish my favourite ones and start wearing them every day.  Plus they protect your eyes from the sun, which is important for both the eyes themselves, and also preventing wrinkles.  I adore aviators too, they look very luxe to me.

Attending to grooming is très important.  Even when at home by myself, and especially when out.  I have been perfecting my grooming regime over time, and by making myself do it even when I couldn’t be bothered it’s now become a habit, much like brushing my teeth, that I do it automatically.

I exfoliate and shave my legs in the shower every two days and wash my hair every second day on the alternate days so I don’t spend too long in the shower.  I apply body lotion every single morning on every part of my body I can reach.  Sometimes it is plain, and sometimes it matches my perfume.

I always wear perfume, even on a home day!  I wear it for me, so I am never without it.  Currently I enjoy having a variety to choose from.  I still enjoy my Chanel No. 5, and more recently Chanel Coco Noir (softer than you would think), however I have a wardrobe of inexpensive fragrances too, for everyday wear.

Painted nails suggest you have plenty of time to lounge around being attended to, but they also suggest you take care of yourself.  I always do my toes in the summer (I gave them a break this winter), but I haven’t done my fingernails in years as working in a shoe shop meant they chipped within one day.  I am inspired to try again with my fingers though.  I read that Butter London polishes are different and don’t chip, so I will try one of their colours.

For makeup, the wealthy look is le no makeup look, with not too much around the eyes.  A polished, natural glow, and a bit of bronzer.  Being so fair, I always look too orange with bronzer (even pale ones), which is a shame as I love the look on others.  So I go the peaches and cream route with a tiny amount of foundation and concealer, a dusting of translucent powder, pinky blush and glossy lips.  Groomed brows and a little eyeliner and mascara completes my look.

As I said before, even when I am at home I wear perfume and a little makeup (less than if I’m going to work).  Somehow it affects the way I act and how efficient I am throughout the day.  Even though I can’t see myself unless I pass a mirror, I feel like less of a slob!

Lastly is jewellery.  Keeping my real jewellery very clean ensures its sparkle and therefore the wealthy look.  If you don’t have jewellery cleaner, dishwashing liquid and a clean toothbrush will make it look beautiful.  Use on gold and all precious stones except for emeralds.  I squirt a tiny amount of dishwash on the toothbrush, clean my ring or necklace (including the chain) carefully and then rinse in warm water and dry.  You will be amazed how good they look.  Pearls just need a polish with a soft cloth and plenty of wear, as the oils in your skin keep them nice.

Actually, clean is probably is one of the biggest things in looking expensive.  Think pristine light coloured clothing, just-washed bouncy hair, sparkling jewellery and polished, clean shoes.

What else would you add to this list?

Joie de vivre

Keeping my joie de vivre is much easier when I take notice of the small pleasures around me.  Taking enjoyment in everyday life is the secret to happiness I think, more so than ‘big’ things.  Well both are good, but I try to appreciate the little things as well.

This morning I was checking out our small freezer to see if there was anything for dinner tonight (there was not) and I found a lone mini-croissant from not too long ago.  Yay!  I now have a yummy little bonus to have with my fresh fruit and raw nut breakfast.  I have it out thawing to go in the oven soon.

I am also feeling grateful because the house is lovely and tidy and clean and I already have the washing hung outside, so I feel like I have the whole day stretching in front of me to do with as I please.  Tomorrow I’m back at work but today, today is for (apart from a few household jobs) sewing, knitting, movie watching and general pottering.

Some days I find it hard to muster up any joie de vivre and know that I am not fun to be around, even I can’t stand myself.  I have a set of three tiny notebooks (with cute Montmartre and Parisienne line drawings on the covers) that my sister gave me and I am on to filling up the second one so far.

The notebooks are small enough to put in my shoulder-bag (which isn’t very big) and they are filled with uplifting and inspiring quotes that I have collected over time.  They might be a line from a movie, a phrase from a book, or a line from a blog or website.  They also include little goals that I think of and health plans I have for myself.

I read through one of my notebooks until I come across something that will cajole me into a better mood or make me realise I am being a spoiled brat.  Sometimes it happens within a split second which seems like a miracle.  It really is true that our mind precedes all else.  Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich has the secret right there in the title!

I remember hearing on an audio CD that you can’t just ‘make dinner’.  You have to think of what you’re going to make and then go about checking that you have the ingredients and THEN make it.  The same is true of us.  We can’t just be skinny or be stylish or be a better person.  We have to think of it first and be in that frame of mind before the rest follows.

‘Our life depends on the kind of thoughts we nurture. If our thoughts are peaceful, calm, meek, and kind, then that is what our life is like. If our attention is turned to the circumstances in which we live, we are drawn into a whirlpool of thoughts and can have neither peace nor tranquility.’ –  Elder Thaddeus of Vitovnica

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Housework Inspiration – The Magazine Technique

I find I need constant encouragement to do the housework. I'm sure I'm not alone in that I love a nice, clean, tidy house, but when it comes to it, how much fun is pushing around a heavy vacuum cleaner and cleaning the bathroom, or lugging a mattress to change the sheets? And I'm too thrifty and private to want to hire a cleaner. Besides, once I get going I do actually enjoy being my own cleaner.

Last week I used a method I think I heard about from Alexandra Stoddard. She said people asked her why homes in magazines always looked so much better than their own. The reasons I remember her giving were:

- These homes have been cleaned within an inch of their lives, and
- Cords and plugs are hidden out of the way. They could be pushed along the edge of the carpet and skirting or taped to a table leg, and finally,
- Superfluous items are taken out of a room to give an open, breezy look.

She also said it is very useful to take photos of your rooms and study them. Things which stand out as unattractive in a photo, your eye will be accustomed to seeing as you see them every day. But a photo shines a bright light on them.

I added to this my love of makeovers, whether it’s clothing, hair-and-makeup or peoples homes. I took my own Before photos last week, just of the main areas, and then set about sprucing everything up as I cleaned.

I must say I had a very productive day, and at the end of it I took my After photos. At the top is our living room, featuring our new sofas which we saved for, ordered and waited, and finally received late last year. They were handmade right here in the city where I live by a company that has been around for many decades.

We went into their showroom looking for 'plain' sofas, and came out with these. We had in our mind that we wanted the sofa from the Frasier tv programme, which is apparently based on Coco Chanel’s sofa in her Ritz Paris apartment (but hers was made of suede, not fabric. Can you imagine?). But when I saw this Chesterfield style but in fabric, I fell in love with it.

Then, the fabric we chose ended up being made in France. We had to wait longer for it as the fabric mill was closed for the month of August. Being a Francophile I know that almost the entire country closes down for the main summer month of August.

It was quite fun to be ‘involved’ in a French tradition, but it didn’t make waiting for our sofas any easier!

The other photos are of our bedroom and ensuite, just the Afters though. The Befores aren't nearly as pleasing to look at.

Bastille Day

Since being an adoptive care-giver for elderly poodle Atlas almost three years ago, I have kept in touch with my poodle friends, and am regularly invited to poodle events despite no longer having a poodle!

I love catching up with them all and of course, the four-legged company is so darling. I love that I am now an honorary member of their little gang, and I get to be the doting Aunty at lunches and get-togethers.

This Bastille Day, last month, I was asked if I would like to be involved in a special Bastille Day Poodle Fashion Parade with them all. Yes please! I was kindly given a loan-poodle, sweet 13 year old Amy and was part of the group of 23 poodles and their walkers on the catwalk (dogwalk?).  Amy had two changes of clothes from my dear friend Barbara’s pet boutique Yuppy Puppies in Auckland.

Barbara was concerned because she needed French music to play during the show. Yes, I could help her out with that!  I don't know why she didn't ask me first when she thought to herself 'who do I know who is nuts about anything French'.

We put together a fun and jaunty playlist including Fabienne Del Sol, a few tracks from Hotel Costes, Saint Germain du Pres and Paris Lounge compilations, a little Pink Martini, a Serge Gainsbourg and even an Edith Piaf (we found one upbeat track of hers, usually she is a little more… morose, but I do love her).

Barbara had even organised a videographer to film the event, so you can see us on You Tube here. Such fun! After the show, we retired to Barbara’s beautiful home for ladies luncheon. Macarons of course featured on the menu, made by one of the ladies. I was so impressed by that as I have heard they are notoriously hard to make.

Most of the ladies balanced a poodle and a lunch plate on their lap. It seems that many poodles are adorably co-dependent. Hostess poodle Zoey trotted around making sure everyone was ok.

 
I don’t know what Atlas would have thought of this day. To be truthful, I don’t think he would have known much of what was going on. Being not that sighted and also hard of hearing, he may not have noticed the crowd but he would have enjoyed himself just the same.

And I would have had to help him off the catwalk otherwise he would have fallen off the end. Dear sweet little Atlas. He was there in spirit though.

If you haven’t met Atlas yet, click on the Poodle Chic tag. He was a honey.

The Paris Winter

I have just finished reading The Paris Winter by Imogen Robertson. This book is not my usual, in that I am not that fussed with historical fiction and generally do my best to avoid it. I much prefer stories set in modern time. But Paris swayed me and so I found myself visiting (and much enjoying) 1909.

The tv series Mr Selfridge has just started here and we’ve seen the first two episodes, so I was tickled to see that this is also set in 1909. I loved the fact that I had a pictorial view of what the times were like in that era and could imagine its Paris equivalent, just across the water from London.

This book is a slower read than my normal choices, in that it took me about a month to read when usually I can get through a title in two weeks, sometimes even one week if it’s a ripper. The last one-weeker I had was Sophie Kinsella’s latest recently.

The Paris Winter is like a hearty and delicious French meal in that you want to chew it slowly in order to fully appreciate the flavours. I actually found myself reading more carefully to ensure I took in the descriptions and words used. The author has quite a magical quality to her writing that makes you remember all the characters and never be confused about what is happening.

The pace carries you along too as I never felt like I was pushing myself to read it. Life is too short for that I have decided, and if I find myself making excuses about picking up a book I have started, I just flag it and move on.

I chanced upon this title from reading a brief but favourable review in a magazine. I am glad I did not know too much of the storyline before I started, so I could enjoy its unfolding set during what was quite a major part of French history. You will probably want to Wikipedia this event as I did afterwards.

A wonderful part of The Paris Winter was a handful of pages at the end of the book outlining who were characters that were taken straight from history, and details of others who were based on or inspired by real people.

It also has an art component, in that the main character is a young English woman who has travelled to Paris to attend art school. There are fabulous descriptions of art peppered throughout the book that even I as a non-artist can appreciate, and it all ties in beautifully at the finish.

One fun thing I enjoyed doing during reading was to Google Map some of the street names that featured in this book, such as Rue de Seine and Place Pigalle in Paris. Using Street View I could have a look around and imagine the characters living there and walking down the footpaths.

I love Google Maps so much and often pop into New York City or Paris for a fix. I even visited Moscow the other evening. Such fun! I really am a cheap date. Sometimes I visit the main parts and other times I drag the little yellow man onto a random suburban street to see how ordinary people in that area live and what their houses look like.

I copied down a few quotes from The Paris Winter as I read it. You might enjoy them too.

(Tanya, a well-to-do young Russian woman, also studying art at the same art school):
‘Always have the means to a graceful exit to hand – don’t you think that is one of the best lessons we learn? I always have a gold sovereign sewn into my travelling dress. Actually half a dozen, so the line isn’t spoiled.’

(The main character Maud, in an upmarket jewellery store in Paris):
There were three other women in the shop, all moving with the slow graciousness of wealth. They were as magnificent and polished as the shop itself.

Image from Wikipedia.

Bonjour

I want to thank my dear readers and friends for the emails and comments you have left since I stopped writing on my blog. I have read every one, and been quite humbled at the lovely things you have said.

I am so happy that you might have found something on my blog to help you out in a down day, but the truth is, writing my posts helps me too. It works out things in my head and sometimes it doesn’t feel like I am thinking about what I’m writing, it just comes out of my fingers on the keyboard.

I do really miss writing on my blog, but felt shy about coming back.  I did and still do find the blog world quite overwhelming so it has been a refreshing break to not be in it.

Life is very similar to when I left you, just a little busier perhaps. I am still trying to be more conscientious at work in our store (I am not a very hard worker!), be happy, be a good wife and family member and friend, be healthy and all those other things that we all work towards.

My darling husband and I still have Miss Jessica, and we also adopted her kitten Nina from the same cat shelter just over a year ago. Jessica is now four, and Nina is three. What can I say, Jessica was a young mother!

Jessica and Nina are like peas in a pod and we sometimes get them mixed up if they are facing away from us. They keep us amused with the funny things they do. I often say they are worth their keep in pure comedy value.

So please do pop in if you feel like it. I don’t know what my routine will be like yet, but I will be writing more on my beloved idealistic chic lifestyle.